szabgab: (Default)
Gabor Szabo ([personal profile] szabgab) wrote2009-08-20 07:21 am

Feeling uneasy spamming people

I am following the suggestions several people gave me on how to get involved in DW. I am checking out people linked from the comments to that post and some other posts I made. Reading some of their entries commenting on those entries I find some interesting and marking them as being in my circle. Then I follow some more links from their posts and do the whole thing again recursively.

But I feel uneasy commenting on blogs of total strangers and marking people quite randomly. Why them and not some others from the other 6 billion out there?
I don't know them personally. I don't even know them online. Maybe I read a few lines they wrote, but then what?
That does not really give me any right to just push my unwanted words on them.

I have my own blog elsewhere where I have been writing for 3 years or so but that was strictly professional. I was commenting on other peoples blogs but those were professional entries as well.

I guess I am uneasy with getting too personal with total strangers.
angel_negra: Yellow flower stands out. (Stand_out)

On commenting and strangers...

[personal profile] angel_negra 2009-08-21 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
Some of my best friends are total strangers. And hardly any of them know my real name. :)

One girl I follow? The longest conversation we ever had was an all caps discussion about the awesomeness of an actress we both liked. I've got another friend who I try to support through her stresses and family problems - and I've never known her first name. And another girl who I've met offline several times.

And they all started out as random strangers online. I friended/commented to them because something they said caught my eye and I wanted to know more. It is a little scary at first, making that first comment. But if you think about it, they put those posts out there. They're sending signals out into the void of the internet, and maybe it'll get a return signal from someone else, maybe not. But they leave those posts out there, open for return words. For words others WANT to share back.

Heck, that's also how I've made several other friends. It started as someone commenting out of the blue. A moment of 'YES, me too!'. The path you took to finding that moment can be twisted and random and silly, but really, when you think about it, a lot of offline relationships can be as random. A series of random choices one day led me to wind up waiting for a bus beside another woman, who I wound up having a ten minute conversation about working out, allergies and cats with. I never knew her name, nor did she know mine. It was just a wonderful moment of connection. If I'd left work earlier, or skipped the gym, we'd never have met.

So why NOT those few people out of the other 6 billion out there? That's the beauty of the web, of social blogs, of life. You can meet people who you can share ten minute conversations about cats, you can meet people who you only share the vague details of your life with, or you can meet people who know everything about you. Just start small. Connect back to that which pinged at you.

And welcome to DW. :)